I’m not new to street harassment (unfortunately), but this is the first time that an event has ever occurred so close to my home. I currently live a measly 3 or 4 houses away from where this happened. This is also not the worst thing ever said to me BY FAR. But the events that occur after it have truly left me SHAKEN.

Its about 10 on a pitch black Friday night, and I’m walking home from having dinner with a friend. I begin passing a house (7 Ivy Avenue, Toronto Ontario) that has 3 older ‘gentlemen’ (I use the term loosely) standing outside it. (I assume having a smoke.)

As I start passing by, they whistle….I ignore it…then one of them says in a sexual voice, “How about you come give us a kiss?” …I take a step to walk away when I hear them about to start saying more. I lose it. I have stuff like this happen bi-weekly!

I yell back, telling them where they can promptly go, to which they laugh of course, make “oooOOoooOoo” sounds, and one of them says, “Oh yeah, I still got it.”

I start walking off in a rage as they are still laughing…and they watch me go into my home. (Great, they know where I live.)

Now, normally I get mad, complain to my friends a lot, and then try and ignore it till next time. But I’m MAD and just plain SICK of it. So I called the police and am forwarded to the station in my area, where I ask them, “What are my rights as an individual to NOT be sexually harassed on the street?”

The officer seemed confused and asked what I meant. I explained my situation, saying how often these events occur, and what I could do to STOP the harassment.

To which I was told to, GROW THICKER SKIN.

Never in my entire life have I been so disgusted…I cannot believe that was the option given to me, for protecting myself!!!

You better believe this will not be the end of it.

- JaguarGrin

Location: 7 Ivy Avenue, Toronto, Canada

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Last night WUSA Channel 9 produced a news story about sexual harassment on the Washington, DC transit system. In it you can see what Metro’s stance is….that it isn’t a problem and that “one person’s harassment is another person’s flirting.” The text below the video is not a transcript, so you can gain more info by reading it after watching the video.

From around 1 – 3 p.m. EST today you can watch the DC City Council’s Performance Oversight Hearing of the Metro system (select Room 500). I’m joining several people, being led by Collective Action for Safe Spaces, in testifying about the problem of sexual harassment on the metro system because we DO think it’s a problem. We will give our recommendations for change: more data collection, a PSA campaign on how to report harassment, and more sensitivity training for metro employees.

More later on how it went and what was said. Wish us luck!

Tomorrow a group of Washington, DC-area residents and activists will share their experiences of sexual harassment on the DC metros and buses during the DC City Council’s performance hearing of Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority (WMATA). Chai Shenoy, co-founder of Collective Action for Safe Spaces/Holla Back DC! will open the testimonies and I’ll conclude them.

If you’re a DC resident who has been harassed or seen harassment occur on WMATA, you can still sign up to testify tomorrow (it will take place approximately 1-3 p.m. at the John A. Wilson Building) or write up to a 2 page testimony to submit for the record. RSVP ASAP to shannon AT collectiveactiondc DOT org

Apparently WMATA does not even track sexual harassment on their system and there is no dedicated hotline for reporting it. Unsurprisingly then, they have no PSA campaign as do many other major commuting cities. Consequently, we have three main recommendations when we testify tomorrow, including requesting a dedicated line for reporting sexual harassment and a PSA campaign telling people not to harass and what to do if they are harassed.

On Sunday, the Washington Post covered our intended action – and the story was reprinted today in the commute paper The Express. I want to respond to the following excerpt from the article (and please read the response of Collective Action for Safe Spaces and the response of a writer for the Washington City Paper.):

“Metro Transit Police Deputy Chief Ron Pavlik said his department takes reports of sexual harassment and sexual assault incidents seriously. He says the transit police have have not seen an increase in reports of indecent exposure, rape or other types of sexual assaults.

According to Metro, 84 cases involving sexual offenses were reported to Transit Police last year. They included one rape and 40 cases of indecent exposure or other sexual acts. Of the 40, 12 involved arrests.

Officials said Metro does not track sexual harassment complaints. But Pavlik said passengers who think that they have been sexually harassed should report the incident to Transit Police. Officers receive sensitivity training in handling such complaints, he said.

He cautioned, however, that a variety of behaviors could be considered harassment.

“Someone telling another person: ‘You look good. Can I have your phone number?’ — you may not like it, but I can’t arrest the person,” Pavlik said.

Reports including sexual assault and indecent exposure are investigated, he said.”

My response:

1. Wow, only sexual assaults and indecent exposure is being tracked? That’s not good enough. Most harassment is what they’re not tracking: sexual comments, sexual noises, leers, and whistles. No wonder Metro doesn’t think this is a problem — they don’t allow the full range of experiences to be reported/tracked.

2. Most gropes/grabs, a form of sexual assault, is not reported as a sexual assault because many people don’t realize that’s what it is. 84 reports of sexual offenses is likely quite low compared to the reality, then, especially when rape itself is so under-reported.

3. Without sexual harassment being tracked/reported, I guess Deputy Chief Pavlik had to use his own imagination to explain what women face: being told they look good, followed up by a polite request for their phone number. Or at least I hope that’s why he gave the example he did and not because he purposely wanted to downplay or dismiss the seriousness of sexual harassment. Regardless of his reasons, this is the outcome:

a) He simplified and distorted what actually happens in cases of harassment. Instead of someone saying,”You look good. Can I have your phone number?” (which, yes, is legal) street harassers tend to include sexually explicit language that’s inappropriate to use with a stranger and/or they often will not leave the woman alone after getting a “no” or a blank stare. Instead, the person will leer, follow, grab or continue with verbal comments until the woman feels harassed.

b) He ignored the context. A woman who has been grabbed, followed, attacked, mastrubated at or on and verbally harassed before (and most women have) may be pretty suspicious of any guy who approaches her and says a line like that, whether he intends to harass her or not.

c) He bristled up at the thought of “hitting on someone” being considered harassment and he supported the sexist idea that it’s fine (or at least legal) in all contexts to approach a woman and evaluate her looks and ask for her phone number. I bet 95% of women who ride the bus or the metro are just trying to get from Point A to Point B, not trying to get asked out on a date or have a stranger comment on their appearance. And if they do want to get asked out, they may want to be asked a few things about themselves first or have some light chitchat. Real life is not a movie or a gum commercial.

Again, if you’re a DC resident who has been harassed or seen harassment occur on WMATA, you can still sign up to testify tomorrow (it will take place approximately 1-3 p.m. at the John A. Wilson Building) or write up to a 2 page testimony to submit for the record. Let’s show them that sexual harassment is a real, widespread problem and that it constitutes more than just “Can I have your number” comments and thus, deserves real attention from WMATA and the city council. RSVP ASAP to shannon AT collectiveactiondc DOT org

Today was the second time I’ve experienced a creepy guy in the cafe at London’s Wellcome Collection. I’d been working in the library solidly for about four hours and was looking forward to a well-deserved coffee and biscuit break, so went down to the cafe. I choose a window seat right in the corner with my back to the cafe so I could read my book in peace.

Despite the cafe being half empty, a guy sat directly next to me (the window seat areas aren’t massive, so it’s an odd choice). I immediately clocked him as a potential problem, and sure enough, he starts the performative posturing: sighing loudly, throwing papers onto the desk in what I presume is supposed to be a masculine and assertive fashion, tapping his pen, etc., etc. He hasn’t bought anything from the cafe, and is evidently more interested in watching what I’m doing than filling in his many pieces of paper.

I’m so sick of this – it happens a ll the time, that a guy is clearly trying to get attention by making me feeling uncomfortable, yet it’s not enough for me to be able to ‘complain’ about it. Lately I’ve taken to simply getting up and moving elsewhere (as I had to two weeks ago when a guy chose, in an almost empty train carriage, the seat directly opposite mine) and that’s exactly what I did today. I want to enjoy my coffee break without being eyeballed and made to feel like I’m ‘fair game’ by having the audacity to take a break from my work in the middle of the afternoon.

Predictably, almost as soon as I pointedly moved to another area, he decided to leave, having obviously finished all that important paperwork….

- Jen

Location: Wellcome Collection Cafe, London, UK

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
Find suggestions for what YOU can do about this human rights issue.

Read stories, news articles, blog posts, and tweets about street harassment from the past week.

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Street Harassment Stories:

Share your story! You can read street harassment stories on the Web at:

Stop Street Harassment Blog

HarassMap Egypt

Resist Harassment Lebanon

Many of the Hollaback sites

In the News, on the Blogs:

* Hura, “For the Harassers Only: Yemeni Women are not Prostitutes“

* The Sydney Morning Herald, “Low expectations, not necklines, to blame for misogyny“

* Jezebel, “Woman Gets Super Sweet Valentine’s Day Note Asking Her Not to Dress Like Such a Whore“

* Daily News & Analysis, “These women will bring you to your knees“

* Maps4Aid, “Street Sexual Harassment: 20 year old Student saves sister from molesters, beaten up.”

* IAfrica.com, “Miniskirts paralyse Joburg” and Washington Post, “South African women wear miniskirts, march through Johannesburg to protest sexual harassment“

* Khaama Press, “Afghan women suffer street harassment“

* NZHerald, “Friend watches girl’s ‘violent’ assault“

* The Morung Express, “A view on Dimapur“

* Women’s Web, “Talking about Street Sexual Harassment“

* Oppression is Yucky, “trigger warning sexual assault, street harassment, disordered eating, mental health.”

* Women Speak, “I felt like the perpetrator“

Activism Announcements:

New:

* College men in the USA share tips on how men can stop street harassment

* Women in South Africa marched against street harassment; women in Afghanistan held an event showing art and a documentary about street harassment

Reminders:

* SSH founder Holly Kearl is quoted in the March 2012 issue of Cosmo magazine with advice on dealing with gropers. Read an extended version of her advice on the blog.

* If you live in the Washington, DC-area, you can testify about harassment on the Metro system at a hearing on Feb. 22. Details.

* What were you wearing when you got stared at or street harassed? Submit your photo

* Start planning for International Anti-Street Harassment Week, March 18-24

* The Adventures of Salwa campaign has a hotline for sexual harassment cases in Lebanon: 76-676862.

* In Bangalore, India, there is a helpline for street harassment 080 – 22943225 / 22864023

10 Tweets from the Week:

1. @SpookSquad I can relate to that very high level of stress. MT@hkearl: woman w/PTSD says #streetharassment can cause her 2 have panic attacks, disassociate

2. @froovyjosie I think I am going to write a blog post about street harassment. And how f*cking frustrating/scary it can be. ARGH

3. @Lailaelrefai writing dissertation about sexual harassment in #egypt. sources are hard to find. please link me to any reports or books you know of. #EndSH

4. @iHollaback We’re on a call with our site leaders developing a cross-site cross-culuture survey on #streetharassment!

5. @NadaHKandil Walking to the bus stop with my neighbour,got followed by a construction worker who only stopped when a taxi driver shouted at him :/ #EndSH

6. @dopegirlfresh street harassment begins seems to have one source: a sense of entitlement. nobody owes you a hello. IDGAF what you think.

7. @WomenSpeakPro Street harassment makes women change their routine, become defensive and wary, as if they’re the perpetrators. womenspeak.tumblr.com/post/177142043…

8. @tanya_elena @hkearl actually, #sexualharrassment is much better on #wmata than Ny #mta. If only so much wasn’t from agency staff…

9. @jesseadamsstein Good opinion by @Jo_Tovey on sexual harassment on the street: as women well know, it’s not about what you’re wearing bit.ly/x2VpiI

10.  @jatshea I frequently give the finger to men who catcall me.

I have been harassed all my life. I try not to let it dictate how I dress, but I am always grateful when it gets cold outside because then I have the added protection of a coat and maybe even a hat and scarf. Even then, I am harassed, when men cannot even see what I look like. It’s simply because I am young, and a woman, and, to them, an object.

It started when I was young, maybe ten or eleven. I was visiting my uncle’s house with my family. He lived near my grandparents in a very poor part of the region. His next-door neighbors’ son still lived at home, even though he was in his 30s. I had never spoken with him or interacted with him, yet as I got in the car to leave my uncle’s house, he looked at me and deliberately made oral sex motions with his hands, gesturing toward his penis. My parents were turned the other way, talking to my uncle, so they did not see this. I was young enough to not understand what he was doing right away, but I knew it was something bad. I never told my parents, maybe because I was unsure of what I really saw or maybe because I was afraid of “causing trouble”.

Later, in college, I got hit on by boys all the time, driving in their cars shouting, “Hey sexy!” or “Wanna get in my car?” I dismissed it as drunkenness or the “frat” culture.

My worst experience, though, was when I was studying abroad. I took the same route to school every day, walking, although I should have taken a taxi. I never felt particularly unsafe in spite of the high level of comments and innuendos by men. One day, I crossed a walking bridge. I saw a young man, maybe in his 20s, approaching from the other side, and I made sure I was far to the right so he could pass. My eyes were lowered. Suddenly, I was pressed against him, my schoolbag smashed between us. His face was near my neck, and I felt his hands squeezing my ass. It felt like forever, but I was in shock. I had never had someone touch me in public, and somehow I thought that being in public in daylight made me “safe.” Finally, I started screaming, and the man ran away. I stood, shaking, on the bridge, as two businessmen walked up the stairs. They had to have heard my scream, but they did nothing. They didn’t look at me or even acknowledge my presence. I cried all the way to school and never walked alone again. I only told a couple people about it.

Months later, I was at a bar and going to retrieve my coat with my friend from the coat check. We passed two young men as he walked, and one reached around and pinched my ass. I turned around, in shock, and he gave me this slow smile, like he knew I really liked it. I wish I had run after him; I had friends that were standing near the exit waiting to leave. I didn’t though, and when I expressed my extreme anger and frustration over the incident, my friends seemed nonchalant, as if I should expect to be groped a little because I dared to go to a bar. They did not know my previous encounter, so maybe they did not understand how violated I felt.

Whenever I walk somewhere or take public transportation (which is often now that I live in NYC), I am on my guard. I can spot a creeper a mile away, and I will do anything to get my distance from them. I zigzag away from men on the street, no matter what they look like, because you never know when one will get a little too close so they can making a kissing sound near your ear or make a lewd comment. I have actually had men look at me in confusion when they go about their day but happen to get too close and I leap out of the way in fear. I can’t help it – I’ve learned to consider any man on the street a potential predator.

- Anonymous

Location: Unnamed places and NYC

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I’m not exactly sore how this happened, but… I actually was diagnosed with psychosis after I was upset because of harassment.

It was the summer of 2005, the happiest summer of my life, a week before my sophomore year in high school began.

I was a plain dresser, but I decided to wear a long pale green chiffon skirt and a shirt with sequin flowers, when I went to buy some candy and lend a movie from the library.

When I walked through a small square, this pretty normal- looking man glared at me and said in a grumpy voice, “Nice boobs”.

I was absolutely horrified, and couldn’t do nothing else than put um my middle finger. He did the same with both of his hands, called me a “fucking asshole” and started roaring to the sky, “All women are whores!”

The memory still bothered me; even after all these years, I still hear his voice. I still hear him even in my dreams.

It’s so weird, only a silly little comment about my boobs and I completely flew over the cuckoo’s nest; I have been in a mental hospital three times and have attempted suicide.

I think the reason is that I have been troubled a lot in my life, so to say, the seed of the mental illness I suffer from had been planted at me at a early age and the harassment made it bloom.

That’s why I fight the good fight. I’m a one woman army, and I will NOT give up!

- Miia Ylitalo

Location: Vantaa, Finland

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem.
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